


Boyfriends Club

by AgentMaryMargaretSkitz, IncendiaGlacies



Series: The Roommates AU [15]
Category: Arrow (TV 2012), DC's Legends of Tomorrow (TV), The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Roommates/Housemates, F/M, Gen, the girls take a backseat in this one
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-31
Updated: 2018-07-31
Packaged: 2019-06-19 17:59:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,835
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15515418
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AgentMaryMargaretSkitz/pseuds/AgentMaryMargaretSkitz, https://archiveofourown.org/users/IncendiaGlacies/pseuds/IncendiaGlacies
Summary: In which Cisco tries to intimidate the girls’ potential boyfriends only to have them turn his own relationship with Caitlin on him. As usual, Barry is no help.





	Boyfriends Club

**Author's Note:**

> I finally made a contribution to this lovely verse. I wanted to do this around Valentines Day, but life got in the way.  
> Nonetheless, I give you-Cisco Ramon!

“I am sure you are all wondering why I’ve gathered you-”

“Do you start all your conversations this way?” Oliver asked, eying the others sitting in the room with him. Well as best as he could, given the near non lighting.

“No!” Cisco huffed at him.

“Why is it dark in here?” Ray asked in confusion. “And why are we in the laundry room? It’s not even your laundry room, Cisco.”

“Look guys, do we really need to question the aesthetic of the setting?” Cisco demanded. “I am trying to make a point here.”

“Can you make it quickly?” Rip asked dryly. “I have to pick up Jonas from a birthday party soon.”

“You know what, Barry, just turn the lights on! Just turn them all on!” Cisco yelled. “These people have no love for the true art.” Soon the lights came on and Cisco discarded the flashlight he had been holding.

“You said there would be cake,” Ray said sadly, looking around as if a slice of delicious cake would suddenly appear out of thin air.

“Yeah, well I didn’t know how else to get you guys here,” Cisco sighed.

“We were originally going to try and kidnap you guys, you know blindfold and tie you up and all that,” Barry explained with the gestures. “But you guys seem a bit big to do that with,” he said awkwardly, pressing a finger against Oliver’s bicep. The man in question was not very impressed with him. “Sorry.” Barry took a step back next to Cisco.

“Oh that reminds me, Rip can we get some cake after?” Cisco asked him.

“Have some cupcakes left over from the bake sale if you’d like,” Rip offered with a shrug.

“Yay, cupcakes!” Ray cheered, holding his hand up for a high five with Barry which was returned.

“I’m sorry, can we focus? Cisco, why are we here?” Oliver asked sternly.

“Right.” Cisco straightened up and cleared his throat, grabbing his ruler (he came prepared for all occasions) and slapped it against his open palm, trying to be menacing. Of course, it was ruined by the whimpering ‘ow’ he gave right after, and the glare Oliver sent him.

“Dude, just get on with it,” Barry hurried him along.

“Right! It has come to my attention – well, really anyone with an eye and half a brain cell, doesn’t even need to be a properly functioning eye really – it has come to my attention, that you three want to date my girls. As such, I thought it was only right to go over some ground rules first.”

“Oh wait is this The Boyfriend Talk?” Ray said excitedly. “Oh, we gave this one to Ronnie together when he was dating Caitlin, remember? Wait, why am I getting this now? I don’t want to date Caitlin!”

“Not Cait, you moron!” Cisco rolled his eyes. “All right, I see I’m going to start from the top here. Ray and Lily – stop spluttering, you’ve been making goo-goo eyes at her since you two met. Rip and Gideon – no, no! Man, she babysits for you every other weekend and cries anytime a kid so much as looks at her the wrong way. And finally, Oliver and Felicity – you’re literally dating her – don’t start with me!”

“Man, I wish I had popcorn for this right now,” Barry murmured as he ate a piece of licorice. All of them turned to stare at him. “What? I have a high metabolism, I get hungry really easily. Sorry, did you guys want some? I can like, grab some Big Belly Burger for you guys?” he offered them. “No?” he squeaked at the looks on their faces. “All right then.”

“Okay, I’m still not seeing why we need to be here right now,” Oliver said slowly.

“Oh, well see, with Ronnie, what we did was try and intimidate him. You know, just sort of give him the big ‘don’t hurt her’ speech,” Ray explained with a grin.

“Dude, you’re stealing my thunder!” Cisco complained.

“Sorry.”

“Mr. Queen does bring up a good point though,” Rip interrupted the squabble. “Technically speaking, he is the only one dating one of the girls. Ray and I, are most certainly not.”

“Yeah, but you want to,” Barry said.

“I mean I wouldn’t say-”

“Honestly, it’s just a good friendship and with Jonas-”

“Bah, bah, bah, bah, bah!” Cisco raised a hand to silence them once more. “They are my girls, you want to date them, you go through me. Now obviously, I may not be the most physically intimidating – D in gym class – but what I lack in muscles I make up for with my mind. I can be very creative with my punishments.”

There was a long moment of silence before the three men burst into laughter.

“Oh, oh no! Cisco it’s not you,” Ray reassured him.

“No, it’s not,” Rip said.

“Cisco, these girls are brilliant and scary in their own right,” Oliver reminded him kindly. “I mean, have you seen them with Carter? I’m fairly certain they can take care of themselves.”

“Gideon is certainly an evil genius,” Rip said with a nod, remembering her stories about Nathaniel.

“Felicity can literally hack into anything she wants,” Oliver added.

“Lily is a nanotech genius. And I would never hurt her,” Ray said softly. “I mean, if anything were to happen. Which, you know, it’s not.”

“Cisco, since when have they been your girls?” Rip asked strangely.

“Well duh, I’ve known them longest so-”

“I’ve known Gideon longer than you have,” Ray reminded him. “Ronnie knows both Lily and Gideon better and is their actual foster brother. We’ve known Felicity the same amount of time. Really the only girl you’re extra close with is Caitlin.”

“Yeah, you and Caitlin are pretty close. Best friends for how long?” Oliver asked, a prodding in his question.

“A while, since college.”

Rip picked up on the line of questioning and couldn’t help but continue. “You two are very close.”

“She’s my best friend. Other than Barry,” Cisco hurriedly added at his affronted noise.

“Yeah,” Ray said unconvinced. “Best friends like me and Lily, or Rip and Gideon, or maybe even Oliver and Felicity?”

“What?” Cisco scoffed and half laughed. “What? You guys aren’t actually thinking that I have feelings – like, romantic feelings – for Caitlin, are you? Because that would be absolutely ridiculous.” Cisco tried to lean against one of the washers and slipped his elbow, only to try again.

“I believe you came up on that all on your own,” Rip said quietly.

“But you do take extra good care of her. Always there to lend a hand. And you basically live at their place,” Ray added.

“That is sort of true,” Barry muttered. He shrugged at Cisco’s look of betrayal. “What? Dude, you’re always over there or Caitlin’s always at our place – not that I’m complaining. I love her too!”

“Iris is always at our place!”

“Yeah, Iris. My girlfriend,” Barry said pointedly.

“Not really helping your case,” Oliver said.

“We are losing sight of things and missing the point. This isn’t about me and Caitlin-”

“What isn’t about me and you?”

The boys jumped as the aforementioned girls walked into the laundry room.

“What about me and you?” Caitlin asked again with an arched brow.

“Nothing,” Cisco said nervously. “We were just talking about that _Star Wars_ marathon we were going to have. You, me, Barry. You know, bestie.” He punched her arm playfully.

“Cisco, why are you here?” Gideon demanded as she started throwing her clothes into a machine. Rip immediately got up to help her sort out her whites from colours.

“Just, you know, checking out the scenery.”

“In our laundry room?” Lily asked confused while Ray took her laundry basket from her. He claimed it looked too heavy for her.

“It’s a nice place you’ve got here.”

“You need a load of laundry done?” Caitlin asked him and Barry. It would hardly be the first time she did it.

“No, we’re good,” Cisco assured her. Caitlin shrugged and stuffed her clothes into the machine.

“And what are they doing here then?” Felicity pointed to Oliver and Ray.

“Visiting?” Cisco tried weakly.

“Fine, don’t tell us what your super-secret all boys club is about,” Lily said, throwing her hands up and rolling her eyes.

“Just remember gentlemen, no satanic rituals in the basement,” Gideon said.

“You really need to stop watching so many freaky documentaries,” Felicity groaned. She turned to Oliver.

Gideon shrugged easily. “You watch cold cases all the time,” she argued.

Gideon exchanged a fond look with Rip as Lily thanked Ray for his help and both were invited up for snacks later if they wanted (Jonas as well once Rip picked him up, obviously) and then they made their way out of the laundry room. Felicity gave Oliver a quick kiss and got a confirmation of their next date night and followed after the two, yelling about the differences between cold cases and documentaries.

“You know you guys are welcome to stick around as well. You don’t need to hang out in the laundry room if you miss me,” Caitlin teased.

“I’ve got plans with Iris,” Barry said apologetically.

“Awww, okay,” Caitlin said sadly. “What about you?”

“Yeah, I’ll be up in a few,” Cisco said with a nod.

“Cool. See you in a few. And if you change your minds about laundry, just throw them in with mine!” she called as she left.

“Caitlin does your laundry?” Oliver asked.

“And Barry’s!” Cisco reminded them.

“Like one time!” Barry protested.

Before the two could get into a full blown argument, Oliver came up and patted Cisco’s shoulder. “You might want to think about the definition of a best friend versus a girlfriend, man.” He turned to Rip and Ray. “You guys too.”

They both shifted uncomfortably. Rip cleared his throat. “Look, the point is, even if something were to happen, the girls are more than capable of looking after themselves. Your actions are incredibly chivalrous, Cisco, but unneeded.”

“And we respect them way too much to ever hurt them,” Ray added.

“But if we ever do, you have full permission to kick our asses or get revenge however else you see fit,” Oliver said.

“Just know we have the same rights for Caitlin for if and when you ever start dating her. Or I do, anyway,” Barry said with an easy shrug.

“So, are we done here?” Oliver asked.

“Yeah, I have to go pick up Jonas,” Rip added.

“Oh, but we still get cupcakes, right?” Ray asked excitedly. Rip sighed and nodded, and the trio headed out of the room.

Barry placed a hand on Cisco’s shoulder and grinned. “Well, I think that went pretty well. Good job, buddy!”

“Yeah, just super,” Cisco mumbled, his head far too cluttered with thoughts of Caitlin and friendship and everything else. When the hell did they turn this around on him? And why did he suddenly think they might have had a point?

**Author's Note:**

> Kudos/Comments?


End file.
